Stories.

When I was 19, I started working with a non-profit organization that addresses addiction, depression, self-injury and suicide. I left college and spent most of my time on the road, sharing hope and hearing stories. The road is not how you may think it would be, my friend calls it ‘the land of distraction’ and distracted I was. Every day in a new city, which is incredible, but I really got to know what lonely means. So I was lonely, and I was addicted, and I was learning, and for once in my life I had something to talk about. 

And there was the day I met Lauren and she handed me her knife and she told me about the scars on her arms and how Jon’s words had saved her. 

There was the day that Anita Rose spoke so slow about losing her daughter to CPS because of her mental illness, and I didn’t know what to say so I just wept. 

Then there was that day where we lost Casey, and Anthony sang, “They Looked Like Strong Hands” and for a whole week everyone drank themselves to sleep. Then we made a t-shirt to help Casey’s family and someone bought it and he said he lost his brother and since then everything was broken. 

There were so many times where I just felt like giving up. I’d settle for a cigarette and an awkward attempt at composure, go back inside, and try and make it through the rest of the night. My heart got so heavy and my hands began to shake. Then, it was just me, trying to go it alone.

That was a season in life, and I’m still failing, feeling, hurting, smiling, breaking, but now…now there’s You. 

You forgive. You Guide. You Love. I don’t think I’ll ever understand, but I’m thankful for redemption, that my story isn’t finished yet…that I may be meant for amazing things.